Start of #lunar-iog2 buffer: Tue Apr 18 21:30:03 2006 >> Lude Start! >> As the tension of the past few minutes winds down, Saki remains slumped against the pillar she has been using as a support, mumbling to herself under her breath. She looks very seriously spooked, and just slightly shaky. * Vytor slowsly walks over to Saki, weaving his way around the various support personell trying to get control of the situation * Vytor stops in front of her, and considers her for a moment, seeing if she responds to his presence. <> * Saki continues for a while; a string of curses at the Prophetess, then a "... get the hell out of my head..." and... then she's looking a little more in tune with reality as she notices Vytor stop in front of her. She lifts her head slightly, and nods in recognition, face hardening. Hey, you OK? * Saki snorts derisively; at Vytor or herself, it's hard to tell. "... no," she rumbles out, then smirks without humour. "But that's nothing new." * Vytor looks around, seems satisfied that they're far enough away from the others, and sits down next to her That's actually what I wanted to talk to you about. * Saki lets herself slide down the pillar slowly, ending up seated next to Vytor and staring dully at the floor, not saying anything else. * Vytor pauses for a moment, as if trying to figure out what to say next. Do you remember when we all first met up? When all this craziness began? You asked if you could count on us when things got tough. At the time, I really didn't have any doubt that I could count on you. Please don't be offended by this, but I'm beginning to wonder about that now. * Vytor kicks at a stone * Saki sighs out a shaky breath and nods, tugging at her ponytail in agitation. "...mm," she offers, helpfully. * Zack is now known as ZackStudy I don't want to deny what you've done for us so far. When we've needed you to stand up, you've done so. And I appreciate that. But there have been times when you've reacted in extraordinary ways to things that I can't see or sense. Not to mention asking me to keep an eye on your when we went to that Cernavrnal tower thingie. * Vytor scratches the back of his head And then...you start muttering about where the Prophetess is going to hit next. * Saki sighs out all of a sudden, rubbing a hand across her face. She grumbles slightly; "I know. I... it's a pretty long story." I'm a patient fellow and a good listener. I'd like to be clued in on this one. Assuming you don't mind telling me. * Saki drags the hand back through her hair, grumbling for a moment. "... starting to feel like a stuck record..." Then in a violent motion she's shaken her head to clear it. "... no, you're right. Something... is happening, and I don't know what, and it's probably connected to all of this." She says the words in a strained rush. What's happening to you? Part of the problem is that I don't know what's going on inside you. * Saki leans back against the pillar, closing her eyes. It's a long pause before she talks. "... This might get hard to explain, but... you've heard of those people who have been hallucinating since the Upheaval?" A little bit. I can't say its happened to me, so I haven't paid much attention to it. * ZackStudy is now known as Zack * Saki scratches at her temple, a nervous flick of a movement. "... I get it sometimes. ... a lot. And... badly. It's like..." She suddenly bursts into agitated motions as she tries to explain it, voice a rush. "Like the world's all wrong, like nothing's quite real. I'm looking for doors that aren't there and all I remember of being a kid is little flashes and feelings." * Vytor listens to this quietly, moving out of the way of the wilder motions Saki makes So, its as if you're seeing two versions of the world at once? * Saki glances across; she might be shaking, very slightly. "Sometimes. If I'm not paying attention, if I'm thinking about things... it's like everything's fractured and wrong." She shakes her head. "I don't really know how to put it in words." Do you mean as if, this world we're in now, isn't what is supposed to be? * Saki makes an aggravated noise, and makes a strange sort of diagonal movement: a nod and a shake. "... kind of. Sometimes /I/ just feel wrong, sometimes it's like I'm all out of shape and I can't keep my head straight..." She sighs out again, and leans back. "... the ruins - both of them - were bad. Like the walls were closing in." * Vytor considers this. So, its a kind of situation where, either you're in the wrong place, the world is wrong, or a combination of the two? * Saki practically slumps, nodding. "It's... everything just feels wrong. And then she comes along, and she's... like a beacon. She's ... real to me, through and through. And I /know/ her and I don't know from where and she looks at /me/ like she knows me and I heard her damn voice in my head...!" She stops abruptly with a shiver, gasping out a breath. A second later she's calmer again, but pensive. Hmm. So no matter how strange things get for you, she's a constant? * Saki yanks on her ponytail, clearly off-kilter; pale and slightly drawn and nervous she's a lot different from her normal self. "I... she's /real/. I don't have a better way to put it. Whatever's wrong with me, she's connected. ... I'm... sure of it. That's why I have to find her." So, is it that connection that gave you the insight into where she's going next? * Saki slumps again, staring at the floor. When she speaks, it's plaintive. "After she left, I ... heard her. Clear as day in my mind." She pauses, then; "'Saki, come to me. Raculi.'" * Vytor leans back and considers this Do you think maybe she's in the same kind of situation that you are? * Saki blinks up, genuinely surprised at the question. "I..." She frowns, tugging at her ponytail again in thought. "... no. She seems too assured. Too in control. If she is, she's one hell of an actor." Well, the reason I ask, is that if you're in a space where things are in flux, and she's the only thing that always seems real, then somehow she might be in that same flux space that you are. * Vytor looks skyward as he continues, "And obviously, she knows something we don't. So maybe that knowledge giver her that confidence that you're missing out on." I mean, if you had the knowledge and power to stop the constant shifting, how far would you go to make that happen? When she last talked to us, what she said makes me think that something's unfinished. Something big. * Saki drags a hand through her hair, nodding. "I'd... follow her to the ends of the earth to find out what. I... need to know." * Vytor looks at Saki again, Well, we're doing that very thing, right?" * Saki nods, sighing out. "... yeah. Crazy or not, I'm here for good, I guess." Good. * Vytor relaxes a bit, "Now that I understand a bit of what's happening to you, I feel a little better." How about you? How are you feeling? * Saki frowns across at the man. "... you're taking the news that I hallucinate and go mad on a regular basis very well," she comments, some of the strength coming back to her voice. "I'll be as close to alright as I get. I just need to... focus." * Vytor raises an eyebrow, "Its not like there's anything I can do about it. Besides, if there is a connection between you two, there might be some advantages we haven't seen yet." So I could spend my time worrying and trying to plan for something I have no control over, or I can have faith and move forward, doing what I can when its needed. * Saki nods curtly, leaning back; again, she closes her eyes. "You're right, I suppose. It's just... hard to control myself when everything starts getting... bad." Well, is there anything that seems to help you come back to the rest of us? * Saki frowns, clearly not used to discussing the matter openly. "It's always there, itching at the back of my mind... meditation helps. And time. And--" She pauses, makes a face, and mumbles something indistinct. And...what? * Saki grits her teeth, and shakes her head. "You'll think I'm crazy. Or crazier." Try me. * Saki drags her hand through her hair once more, and blurts out the word. "Cooking. ... it's ... relaxing," she adds, rather lamely. Sheepish Saki just looks /weird/. * Vytor smiles compassionately at her, "Would it surprise you to know that I feel that way too? Except with crafting and not cooking." I can lose myself in front of the forge for a while, and get centered again, no matter how crazy things are around me. So I understand completely how cooking can help you focus. * Saki nods absently, leaning back again. "... what do you think of all of this? The... Seekers, and the comas, and..." she trails off. To be honest, I really don't know. There's some moments where I think I'm in so over my head I'll never break the surface again. I don't understand a lot of this business. * Vytor shrugs, "But I'm here, I'm involved." That's enough to keep me going, for now. You? * Saki rubs at her face in silence for a moment, then smirks - again, without a trace of humour. "I'm supposed to be connected to it all, and yet I understand about as much as you." Well, I guess if we continue, we'll find out more. Hopefully it will help make sense of all this. * Saki scratches at her head with a sigh, then nods after a moment. "... it's all I've got to go on." She sighs again, and gets painfully up to her feet. * Vytor looks up at Saki as she stands. Is that one thing enough? * Saki shakes her head grimly, surveying the damage once more. "... it's all I've got to go on. I've never seen anything at all like her; got to follow her." * Vytor nods I suppose so. What else is there to do? * Saki finally looks something back to her usual self, and she glances down at Vytor with a final calming breath. "... get out of here, for one. I need to calm down and--" she frowns at the devastation. "... just be somewhere else." * Vytor stands up, "That might be a good idea. Just don't go somewhere we can't reach you if we need help, OK?" * Saki nods curtly. "I'll be around." Good. And...thanks for talking to me about this. I appreciate it. * Saki tilts her head in a sort of assenting bow. "... yeah. I don't much feel up to telling everyone." * Vytor mimes zipping his lip * Saki sighs again, and offers a wry smile. "Thanks. I'll find some place for us to all stay." She turns, starting to pick her way through the rubble and out of the building. Seeya later then. * Vytor watches Saki walk away for a moment, exhales, and then sets off in the opposite direction. <> «ooc: Ditto! That's probably a good end line. » >> LUDE END THERE! End of #lunar-iog2 buffer Tue Apr 18 21:30:03 2006